Once broken,considered sold.
Even mended,the scars will forever be there.(i'm sure,i heard it from somewhere)
You know,it seemed really hard to return back to old times,
even if you pretended like nothing had happened.


I'm certainly not magnimous,nor can i forgive and forget.I bear grudges,i can be angry with someone for a year or longer,i can be jealous,i can be stupid,i can be selfish,i can be everything mean.
I dare not say I am perfect,because i know im a meanie at times,or most of the time.

Because even if you and I pretended that nothing had happened,I am still in anger,right in the bottom of my heart.
I don't know how long can i keep this,because i totally feel that im a faker.I feel sick to be someone like that,even for one day.and sometimes i really feel like falling asleep and never awake.

I know it's a small thing,even smaller than my toes.Even the whole thing had ended,settled,i suddenly realised that we have not build up trust,understanding or anything that friends should have after all these years. I suddenly start to doubt that we,friends,are really friends,or that we are just faking all these years.

I treated and called you my friend.But i seriously don't know if you treated me like one after all this or even before it.This is a test,it puts my friendships into test.But i failed it.
I hope time can help me forget.because in my soul,i am still little girl who desires for protection and everything nice.